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how is it that i always end up in these situations?
I threw away the one stable decent thing that I've ever had, just let it walk out the door 3 months ago... and for what? so that I could spend all of my time at a bar being chased by neandrathols who want a piece of ass. I gravitate towards these heartless bastards in search of a piece of ass when I know that in the end I'll end up hurt somehow. I refuse to date anyone because I've got this dellusional idea that Joe will magically walk back through my front door and I want to be available when he does... So I have sex thinking that it will fill some void, or keep me entertained or just quiet the lonliness even if only for a few hours. and i wonder why i'm hurt... i sit here and wonder what the hell happened when they do the exact thing I knew in my heart they would do. And the sad thing is... it actually surprises me when it happens... Written on 2005-02-20 @ 11:25 p.m. |